The LIGHT Center, T-90, College of the Redwoods (476-4290) - April 17, 2000

On Friday, April 21^st, the second of two Diabasis sponsored Brown Bag Lunches will take place. The last one was a success, with the topic surrounding strategies instructors have found to be effective in managing classroom behavior. This week’s topic is less classroom oriented and more directed at those of you who are the "front line" folks, including receptionists and front office staff. None of us like having to deal with angry people, but all of us have to at times. This week’s Brown Bag Lunch will give you some information and strategies to follow when faced with the disruptive and angry individual. A panel of guests will be available including Marilyn Allen, Dr. Harry Pyke, Carol Hubbard, and Michael Floyd. Michael is a professional in the area of mental health in Eureka.

There is a great deal of research and advice regarding how to best defuse an angry situation. The University of California, Berkeley is an excellent resource in this area. Some of the key points that emerge out of their work with conflict resolution deal with the recognition of the angry person’s needs. When interacting with an angry student or co-worker, it is important to keep in mind their need to:

• VENT: The individual who is angry likely needs to "let off steam" and release some of their anger. It is important to allow them this.
• GET YOUR ATTENTION: It’s important to let the person know that you are listening to them; watch your body language and eye contact.
• BE HEARD: The individual typically wants someone to listen to their point of view so you can understand their anger.
• BE UNDERSTOOD: It is important that the angry person perceive that you empathize with his/her experience, and acknowledge his/her right to feel the way he/she does.

When trying to defuse an angry situation, there are some important points to keep in mind. These include:

• Everyone has the right to be angry or upset.
• No one has the right to be abusive or manipulative.
• Focus your attention on techniques to reduce the behavior.
• Hostile and abusive behavior is intended to control and manipulate you.
• Hostile and abusive behavior is learned at a very young age.
• Hostile people will "bait" you. Avoid taking the bait and causing an escalation of the situation.
• The rules of the game suggest that when attacked, you are to act defensively. Don’t play by the other person’s rules.
• Angry people will respond positively if you:
• Appear helpful
• Offer choices
• Acknowledge their feelings
• Reassure them of your understanding and help.

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  SEE YOU AT THE BROWN BAG LUNCH, APRIL 21^st @ 12:00 noon

  IN THE LAKEVIEW ROOM!

CARP is a way to remind yourself of four primary principles of defusing an angry situation.

When communicating with an angry person they will usually "take the floor". This is both verbal and non-verbal. It can include yelling, staring, using a height advantage, and invading your space. You must gain control over the interaction. Humor and surprise are effective means of doing this. Deal with their anger and frustration first, allowing them to proceed more rationally, then you can guide the discussion in a more positive direction.

Let the person know that you understand their situation. This is best done with empathy and active listening.

The control and acknowledgement components of CARP are designed to calm the angry individual. Refocus allows you to deal with the actual problem. Don’t try to deal with the problem until the emotions are under control.

Before you can move onto this component, the person who is confronting you needs to be becoming more cooperative and rational. Then you can get down to business. This component involves actions like giving and getting information, suggesting possible solutions, offering choices, agreeing with a course of action, and finally, following through with the agreed upon plan.

Comments? Questions? mailto:trish-blair@redwoods.edu