Essay (73)

Nature has always fascinated mankind. The tall redwoods of California and Salt Lake in Utah are just two examples of nature’s marvels. With a growing populataion in the United States, and an obvious urbanization occurring, it is more difficult for children and adults to experience the Great Outdoors. In larger cities such as Santa Rosa, New York, and Saratoga, nature is only experienced in small patches of land that we call city parks. Because of this lack of nature, children can not appriciate it. If a child is born and raised in San Jose, he’ll get to experience parties and the city lifestyl, but he won’t get the “outdoor experience.” In Peter Fimrites’s article, “Children Detach From Natural World As They Explore The Virtual One,” fifteen year-old Tommy Nguyen of San Francisco says “I’d rather be at the mall (than in nature) because you can enjoy yourself . . . Although nature is more difficult to access, ever human being should experience it.

In Humboldt County, nature is never more than a twenty minute drive away. The is always a beach, river, lake, forest, or lagoon close by. Since citizens of Humboldt County have this acces to nature, they have a better appriciation for it. Finding someone in Fortuna who would repeat Nguyen’s quote about prefering to be at the mall over the forest would be difficult. It’s appart that the more one is exposed to the natural world, the more they appriciate it. Children who live in urban areas often use techonoladgy to bring them a virtual nature. Video games allow today’s yout to explore great mountains with out ever leaving their chair or energy drink. Fimrite continues in his article to say “(This is) a generation teenage technophiles who always have a cell phone or an iPod in their ear.

What’s the big deal if children avoid nature and never leave their technological gadgets? After all, some kids just want to live a digital life. Fixing computers for a living, I can’t say I hate technology. I always have my cell phone and ipod with me, I love to digitally edit movies, and I have spent a full day in front of a computer. I have also spent full weekends at glacier lakes,state, and county parks. The satisfaction of spending a weekend with your friends at swimmers delight is beyond the satisfaction of raising a level in an online game. Everyone needs to learn that. If we continue down this path of “technophillia,” our nation will become obiese, lazy and completely dependant on technology. Taking a hike is heathly, playing World of Warcraft isn’t.

Getting everyone out into nature is important, but how can urban children see more than just city parks and the trees in the sidewalks? When addressing this issue, Pete Fimrite states; “California is leading the way. Govener Arnold Schwarzenegger issued a proclomation in July, reconizing a children’s outdoor bill of rights, which lists ten activities children should experience before they turn fourteen . . .” This is a good move on the govener’s part. The most important thing a parent can do is take their kids camping, hiking or even just to the city park. This will start people off with an early appriciation of the natural world. Video games can barely mirror the true wonders of nature that have to be experienced first hand.

Essay 73: 2

The thesis of this essay has the beginnings of an argument; however, it’s not focused on the prompt about the problem that youth face. Instead it too broadly focuses on people. The body paragraphs lack transitions; they also lack arguments either in the form of topic sentences or in their content. Instead the writer is able to make observations about technology, locale, and personal preference. The conclusion is more on track, but it’s too late by this point.